“These people are IDIOTS if they actually believe I’m a girl!”
“It’s just the voice that needs work. You don’t need to sound like Minnie Mouse on helium. Just put a little more effort into speaking from your upper body and accentuating your speech more.”
“This whole thing is ridiculous! I didn’t expect it to take six hours to get ready!”
“You had never shaved your legs before…”
“You expected me to? I’m a straight male. I will give women credit though since I had no idea how much effort went into looking pretty.”
“So you DO admit you are a pretty princess who looks passable as a young woman!”
“I’m not going to admit it! Maybe do a second glance in the mirror, but there’s still signs in my face under all of this makeup!”
“LIAR! You know all that contouring paid off and you look like a much younger, female version of yourself! Like a cousin or something. Anyway, Homecoming should be a lot of fun! Jake asked me after I had already accepted to go with Connor. They are friends, so not sure why they didn’t have that conversation?!” It broke my heart to see him complaining on social media that he couldn’t find a date! He is such a sweet guy.”
“When you came across the street and asked me if I could do you a favor… I thought you meant helping rake leaves or something since your dad is out of town… NOT POSE AS A GIRL and go on a date with some guy at your school!”
“Don’t forget your backstory. New name: Vanessa. Home schooled. Parents just moved to the area.”
“Where do they live?”
“Across the street!”
“My house?! What if he asks if we are going over there since my parents will probably want pictures!”
“Glad you are thinking like a girl… Your Great Aunt Susie passed away and they had to go to the funeral in Maine! The boys are meeting us here at my house and should be here any moment!”
“WHAT THE !#$#$#? I know him! He looks just like one of the young guys who works at the grocery store I go to! He is going to recognize me!”
“Told you this is a small town… Umm… Play natural. Don’t act like your male self. Give him a hug when he comes in. Maybe let him kiss your neck later.”
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